Thanksgiving Edition: I’m gonna spread your legs and stuff you full of onion, bread, sausage, and apples.
Capt. Wolf
Perpetually tired mental health counselor, sometimes retro game streamer, comedian, Mensan, coffee connoisseur, bacon lover, chronic pain survivor, nefarious pirate, and generally all-round nice dude…
- 10 Posts
- 1.11K Comments

Uh…no thanks…
Yeah, I think my snail is defective, can I get a new one?
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
News@lemmy.world•Ex-NFL star QB Tom Brady claims his dog is a clone
19·2 days agoAll this tells me that there’s now a cloning service that caters to the bourgeoisie…
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
Games@lemmy.world•What are your favorite games from a worldbuilding standpoint?English
2·3 days agoI don’t know why you’re getting downvoted. I don’t think I ever got so invested in figuring out a story than with Elden Ring. I thoroughly enjoyed following each character’s progression as they all head for the tree. I’m still bummed that I stalled out in the DLC because of the stupid commander Gaius fight. Game was cake up until his gatekeeping ass. Fuck that guy… Someday I’ll feel like trying again.
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
News@lemmy.world•Americans ‘dumbfounded by cruelty’ of Trump officials slashing SNAP benefits
121·3 days agoHey… What’s my nose doing on the floor!? It was just on my face a minute ago!
Why’s this bloody knife in my hand? I couldn’t have done this… Could I? No… I don’t think so.
I should check it for fingerprints. What!? Only my prints are on it!?
Stranger and stranger…
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
News@lemmy.world•Half-naked woman forced out of her home by task force raid
35·4 days agoThis is the part when you hire a lawyer and start suing everyone for everything you can…
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
News@lemmy.world•We tried Tyra Banks’ ‘revolutionary’ hot ice-cream, and colour us confused
8·5 days agoOr just go to the store and get a cup of icing… Mix in some extra corn starch, warm it up, whip it until it’s fluffy. Probably a similar experience… Sounds disgusting either way.
Oh yeah, it’s in my first post, but here’s the main page. Just read more this morning before work. I had no idea you can kill the soldier in the violence district or the wolf in the temple. You can also ride the train and ferris wheel in happy town.
I was looking through that wiki and apparently there’s events and stuff that are triggered depending on certain conditions being met. The other night I was watching someone play it for Halloween and they got a super long cutscene for filling in the face in the middle. I always thought the board was just for showing the kind of dream you had and that everything else was pretty much random or dependent on the day counter. I’m gonna have to load it up now and see what I’ve missed.
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
politics @lemmy.world•Top Trump Officials Are Moving Onto Military Bases
4·6 days agoI can’t wait to be arrested when I vote for the wrong people next week. That’ll be real fun.
Funny that they claim the hat man comes from 2008. LSD for the Playstation had the hat man, though he was called The Gray Man, all the way back in 1998. I kept trying to figure out what benadryl had to do with a character from an obscure game beyond both being sleep related…

Some people power shit…
Me: COMING IN HOT BOSS! CLEAR THE LZ! THIS IS AN EMERGENCY PAYLOAD RELEASE!

Well, they seem to think pedophilia is too, so… yeah… That’s the kind of piece of shit we’ve got here.
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
Aneurysm Posting@sopuli.xyz•French fries with free lead poisoning
2·12 days agoAhhh, that would explain the weird fibrousness of the paper.
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
Aneurysm Posting@sopuli.xyz•French fries with free lead poisoning
71·12 days agoThe whole pic gets weirder and weirder the longer you look at it. I really want to say it’s AI. Like, read the text underneath it, it’s all like weird engrish.
SURVEYOR
“… colonel hearted ferrars. Draw from upon here…”
PROJECT MANAGER
“…way get cold spot its week. Almost do…”
Then there’s what appears to be a scantron fish behind the torn off paper. The glossiness of the paper for what appears to just be a torn out newspaper want ad. The weird texture of the tear…
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
Games@lemmy.world•RV There Yet? is a dad-core co-op game about doing a very bad job driving home from your campervan vacationEnglish
9·14 days agoMy best friend and I have been playing this for the past 3 days and it’s wild. All I was expecting was a game about camping in an RV. We’re now underground and having to navigate explosive gas…
“Honey? I don’t think my meds are working!”
“Why not?”
“The words on the bottle are trying the run away.”
Capt. Wolf@lemmy.worldto
politics @lemmy.world•Donald Trump's meeting with Vladimir Putin called off
2·16 days agoI got you, dude. Starts at like 6:40 and goes on and on, but I’ll sum it up: Video of Putin who doesn’t look or act quite like Putin. Guy in the video admits straight up that this is absolutely conspiracy theory before showing video of Putin making some odd facial expressions. It then goes on to talk about how this has been speculated about for a long time and how Russian news has shown Putin being in more places at once. I stopped watching, but it seems plausible. I can vouch that it’s been speculated about for many years now. However, is it proven fact? Nope.











Username checks out even!