>Get BJ on prom night
>Week later massive red spot on cock
>Herpes
>Fuck
>doctor say this shit is
uncurable
>No woman will want me
>Struggle with shame and depression
>Lose all interest in sex
>Go years without being with a woman
>Finally regain some self confidence
>Brainwave.exe
>Need woman who already has the disease
>Find old hooker on craigslist
>Looks pretty ragged on the blurred photo
>Has probably had a million diseased cocks in her
>Call her up
>Explain I have herpes
>Tell her I presume she has it too
>Silence
>Then she hangs up
I dont know where to go from here bros
Huh, either I dont know I have it or I got lucky. Thats crazy. I imagine an STD test would pick up HSV-2 but I wonder if it also picks up the oral variant. Ive never actually noticed any symptoms on myself. This is actually crazy though I didnt know this, I feel like more people should. TIL lol
No one tests for HSV1 ever unless you have a bad active outbreak.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK47447/
2/3 of the population UNDER 50 have some form of HSV, but virtually every person autopsied that died over the age of 60 will have HSV-1. It’s THAT common. That’s why they don’t test.
You can totally also be asymptomatic for your whole life and not know it. It is also useful to know that “oral herpes” doesn’t exclusively affect your mouth, and “genital herpes” doesn’t exclusively affect your genitals. Just more often. Both types can appear in both locations. The hypothetical person from the greentext would likely have contracted oral herpes. I’m not sure how that works with STD tests, though.
In my experience most standard STD panels will test for HSV-2 but not 1, usually you’d have to special request it
a full STI screen is for HIV, syphilis, chlamydia, and gonorrhoea
blood test - for syphilis, HIV throat swab - for chlamydia and gonorrhoea anal swab - for chlamydia and gonorrhoea urine - for chlamydia and gonorrhoea
afaik they sometimes tack on general biochemistry (sodium, potassium, etc) to the blood test, as well as some other things like mycoplasma genitalium but these are not standard 3-monthly tests
afaik it’s very rare to test for HSV at all, for various reasons
And even when you ask about it, your doc will probably say that the test isn’t worth doing because of how common HSV is and how inaccurate the test is.
I got tested once and the doctor told me testing for herpes is pointless because most everyone has the antibodies in their body due to how common it is. The test gives false positives most of the time.