I can’t see anything

I’ll do more pushups before I eat less peanut butyerm calories ain’t bad if you’re using them!

Isn’t that a rave

How soon before this started happening?

I suggest getting a reusable 2-in-1 spray/pour bottle. Saves a little money if you’re buying two things of oil. If you’re as frugal as me then you buy the oil from a discount store too.

Gotcha. Updates makes the cheeks poppy and verifying integrity of files is the bidet

Would make sense. It is working now without me having to do anything too technical. Seems it just hiccuped and recalibrated.

MFW talking to anyone in my red state

I still struggle at times but I do way better these days. Took a lot of work. I wish you the best!

I was going to DM you but figured it might be helpful for me to post publicly. I do want to add that everyone experiences things differently so I am basing my advice off of MY experience. Some of my advice may not directly apply to you but I still hope you take something from it. What happens before spiraling can look different for each person. I am also very busy right now and writing in a hurry so I apologize if anything is confusing. Feel free to ask me any questions.

So when my father died I literally felt nothing. For years I told people I did not care. I hated when people tried to show me sympathy. I just hated all of it. The thing is it did affect me. I was still very young. I would always try really hard on my school work to impress my dad. When he died I didn’t do school work anymore. I lost all my driver. I came up with other reasons for it. It was never because of my dad’s suicide. This affected my life moving forward. This small piece slowly consumed the rest of my life.

Since I had no drive I did not graduate. School did not matter to me so I was getting high instead. At the time I liked downers because I literally did not want to experience reality. I wanted to black out. I wanted to stay blacked out. You can imagine the messes this made with my relationships with people. I wasn’t really mean or anything to people but I slowly became so self destructive it hurt everyone around me as well. I still would tell people my dad’s death didn’t affect me. I believed it too.

Watch your drive. If you aren’t doing the things you normally enjoy doing. The thing is you can tell yourself “well I am doing things”. I was playing video games. I hung out with friends. I made jokes and laughed. It was me trying to enjoy life because death was always on my mind. They were distractions. Not really what I wanted to do. I wanted to make music and do martial arts.

Go to therapy NOW even if you feel like you do not need it. If you feel fairly functional it is fair to not make weekly appointments but I would to start. If you cannot do therapy for any reason then see if you can find support groups of some kind. Preferably in person. It is good to connect with people who understand what it is like to experience these types of traumatic events. Just make sure they are people who are actively trying to heal.

Had a similar feeling when my dad killed himself. I’ll message you when I get home in case you end up how I did (affecting me slowly without me realizing it eventually spiraling)

It’s about representation

That’s why they want AI Robots

They mean every slur actually.

Oh you haven’t met the right people bud lol once you find that world it grows big.

Yeah basically I saw a friend turn into a Nazi because of the algorithm and just kind of logged off. I did this with TV before everyone went streaming. I don’t like being told what to think.

I haven’t entirely shut myself out but I tune in when I want to now. Otherwise I’m just going to work and doing activist shit. Freetime is video games and books.

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I couldn’t recognize her by the particular photo. Lemmy is the only form of social media I really use. I mostly exist in the physical world and just keep up with the news. You’re right that I know who she is though lol

Who is she

Oh thank you for reminding me. Glad to hear it’s doing well