Pretty good, I’d say! My insurance has agreed to cover my GRS after all and now I’m waiting for the doctor to respond to my email with a surgery date, she was on vacation until Wednesday. On Tuesday, I got a large new tattoo that took the entire day. That was very exhausting but I’m very happy with it, it’s an abstract flower on the side of my thigh and some lines that connect to an older tattoo around my ankle. I also went to the Christmas Market for the first time this year and bought some cool leopard fur gloves, they’re so warm and look great! Also had a laser session and I think I’m almost done now, maybe 1-2 more sessions. Feels a bit weird to not go to my laser lady anymore, I’ve grown quite fond of her.

Trans people who are on lemmy/reddit, I’d say. Plenty of less chronically online trans people I know are quite extroverted. (I’m not disagreeing, just offering another perspective)

HEY HEY HEY! It’s a hideous woman-forehead if anything!

needs more bangs

Have fun! Be aware though that they only open once a month (next is Dec 14th) and will go on winter break until March soon. See hsk.koeln for more info.

Bonus badly framed shot of a 60s tram next to the newest one (there’s a few ones running already but the manufacturer, Alstom, is years behind schedule on production… I think the city’s waiting for 30+ trams that were supposed to be in service by now):

Thank you!! Very helpful!

Oh great, this worked like a charm! I just put the one I had in and rotated it. Thank you!

Solved, more or less. But I’m still open to other suggestions if people want to share quality wallpaper sources :)

You’re welcome! Also, something I forgot: Take care of your hair. Long, well cared-for hair helps you appear more feminine. Get a professional cut and ask the person cutting your hair for advice on hair care and which cut they think is best for you. A wolf cut is often a good start. Bangs are almost always a good idea! If you have rather dry hair / scalp you can probably ditch shampoo entirely and just co-wash. Embrace curls / waves if you have them. Get your eyebrows done professionally and then pluck them yourself, maintaining the shape.

Here’s my two cents, approaching 20 months on HRT. All based on personal experience, I’m not a professional. If you disagree with some of this stuff, that’s fine, we’re not all the same.

• I’d say you can just go look for a basic women’s workout routine. Most women who work out focus on their glutes, legs and abs/core. If you don’t want to go to a gym, find Pamela Reif’s weekly workout plan on Instagram/her app and just stick to that (what I did).
• Nutrition is just as, if not more important than the workout. Eat healthy, protein-heavy and most of all: enough or more! If you starve yourself, you won’t gain. I personally eat a good 30% more than before HRT and still don’t gain weight. A burger / something unhealthy more is better than eating too little for the sake of eating “clean”. Just follow fitness nutrition advice here, there’s no special “transition diet”.
• Breast development is 100% genetics, so whatever growth you experience is just normal/correct. There’s no good or bad. Remember that cis puberty takes 5+ years and many trans women experience breast growth past year 1 or 2. When you’re a year or so in, you can look into progesterone.
• I personally ditched jeans completely a few years ago and haven’t looked back. But that isn’t a must. Make sure high-wasted things really are high-waisted, not mid-waist and just higher up than you’re used to. Real high-waist is belly button level or above. Look for ribcage jeans. Mid-waist tends to look weird on bodies that aren’t very very hourglass-curvy. The waist of a dress is often at the bottom end of your ribs. This is normal and what looks good on most people. The best fashion tip is to wear what women around you wear. Look at women your age in your area/workplace/school and just copy them. Or, even better: go shopping with female friends whose fashion style you like. Don’t order online. I know stores that just cater to women are a bit awkward if you don’t pass, but trying stuff on and feeling it etc. is so much better than shopping online. And if you’re scared: take a friend! This varies, of course, depending on where you live. I live in a left-leaning city and have never had any problems shopping in person when I didn’t pass.
• Experiment with different fabrics. I’ve grown to love velvet-y and silky things!
• Women also tend to wear more accessories than men. Rings, necklaces, chains, charms etc. Collect things you like and get used to wearing them. Rings feel weird at first if you’re not used to them, that’s normal.
• Experiment with your silhouette. Find out if you’re a big top-small bottom or a small top-big bottom kinda girl. Go big-big or small-small. Find out what you like. Use your waist and accentuate with belts. Go second-hand shopping and buy the weird clothes that spark joy. I started dressing fem 2-3 years before I started transition (so now about 4-5 years ago) and have only just found my style. Remember: cis women do this in their teenage years and are a bit ahead of you here! Don’t worry! If you’re unsure, ask a friend whose fashion you like if an outfit looks good. If you don’t have a friend like that, ask young women in second-hand shops. They’re nice, I promise.
• On behaviour: Women tend to take up less space in public (the way they sit and move). Female friendships are very different from male friendships, much more intimate and unhinged. You can tell a good female friend everything. You’re allowed and encouraged to be open with your emotions, this is nice. Confidence is key. If your behaviour is confident, people will accept you more than if you’re hesitant. Confidence is often the difference between “weird” and “mysterious/interesting”
• Bonus thought: What helped me a lot was making my apartment more “fem” and cosier. Candles, plants, plushies, softer colours. This makes me feel better and more in line with myself when I’m home.

Very interesting, thank you for sharing! It’s interesting to me that this artwork does not provoke any thought about gender in me, it’s too alien for my perception I think. I think it’s too animalistic and I need the humanoid form to relate, I’m guessing. Love how different perceptions of art are.

I’ve noticed something similar happening to me. I used to be really aware of my leg hair and shaved obsessively when I started my transition. It made me feel feminine and nice. Now, I don’t care that much anymore. I haven’t shaved them in two or three weeks I think. I’ve become more secure and confident in my identity and don’t need perfectly smooth legs to feel woman enough anymore.

A bit better than last week. I went to work, I saw some friends, had a nice night out on Halloween and a great writer’s workshop the day after. I’ve started progesterone on Saturday again because I’m trying out cycling it currently. It didn’t do much for me when I was on it for an entire month. So far I don’t really feel any different, maybe a bit more energized, but not sure if that is placebo. I’ve been reading lots this last week which is nice and fun. I’m a bit frustrated because I had a weigh-in recently and realised that I haven’t gained any weight despite chugging an additional 700kcal of weight gainer every day.

Ohh I resonate a lot with this! I almost exclusively had female friends before transition already but I feel like transitioning has strengthened our bond so much! I feel like I “get” them so much more than I did before and it’s really so much nicer hanging out with women than with men. I have like 2 or 3 male friends and we aren’t very close. It’s just easier with women for me, the things they say are more interesting to me, they’re more interested in what I have to say. I keep finding that men just bore me when I meet new ones. I was at a Halloween party a few days ago and talked with a guy I met there for half an hour and my god, he started well but it was so boring after a while!! Then I connected with a woman I met there and we vibed so well and I loved talking to her and we said we’d get coffee sometime soon! A man would never, I feel like, haha. So yeah, 100% with you!

Also: Most women I meet are queer so that’s another plus! And nonbinary people are also almost always great to talk to :3

Sending an internet hug :)

Absolutely second the beacon of light thing!! You’re great! (Both of you hehe)

Very quiet and sleepy! I’m usually very active socially but this week was just fall fatigue completely overwhelming me. I didn’t have work this week which meant I slept 9-10 hours a day and stayed in bed until noon most days. Oh well. Fallow season, I guess. The good thing is that I don’t feel that bad about it! I usually do. I installed tinder on Saturday and had two first dates this week, one terrible, one great (see my post). Other than that, life is very quiet right now. I’m waiting to hear back on a job, I’m waiting to hear back from my insurance, I’m waiting for my degree to end. I’m trying to be appreciative and thankful for this time. I have a roof over my head, I have enough money to live, I see people every day.

Oh, and I bought a cute new lamp that’s made my room even more comfy :3

May I ask to what unit you’re referring when talking about testosterone levels? 0.8-0.9 what? I’m personally also below cis female levels (I’m at 12ng/dL) with just 5mg of CPA a day. I’m wondering if I should maybe reduce my CPA dose even further to maybe help my low libido.

Edit: nevermind I figured out you’re probably referring to nmol/L. I’ll leave the comment up anyway for future reference. (0.8nmol/L are 23ng/dL and 12ng/dL are 0.4nmol/L)

You’re welcome! If penetration is what you’re worried about, strap-ons exist. I know it’s not the same and have honestly never tried them but maybe it scratches the same itch. And also I think viagra still works when you’re on HRT, so you’re probably good and don’t need to worry about it :)

So I’m not a very sexual person, just saying that up front. My libido is very low and has always been that way, even as a teenager. For me, sex always felt very awkward when I still thought I was a man. It kinda worked, but I always liked giving oral to my gf more than anything because I felt like her being happy was way more important than me being happy. I had trouble staying hard a lot. In hindsight, I’m pretty sure that was because I didn’t feel comfortable performing as a man during sex.

Now, after 19 months on HRT (pre-op), I can’t get hard at all without a magic wand, so penetrating someone is quite unrealistic. But I also wouldn’t want to. I do however like performing a more feminine role and like receiving oral more than I did before, even if I often don’t cum from it. I just feel way better and more comfortable in my body.

All in all, for me personally(!), sex is such a small part of life that I would never ever delay a transition because of it.