Substitute it for “Those I don’t know half as well as I should like and those I like half as well as you deserve.”

Just shorten the whole thing to “folks”

“Friends, foes, and those yet to decide.”

I’m always a fan of just “my fellow degenerates”

Change it to, “Friends, Neighbors, Total Strangers who wandered in off the street…”

just say “Gentlefolk”

Salutations, meatbags!

Friends, Romans, countrymen!

Greetings programs.

I think the best greeting for this is just “everyone”

it’s how the announcements on my trains changed over time, starting from addressing “ladies and gentlemen” to “hello everyone”

Honored motherfuckers

Ladies, Gentlemen, Esteemed Peers. (if you want to be serious)

Ladies, Gentlemen, and you special assholes (if you’re in a group of close friends and trying to be funny).

source: I am non-binary.

Comrades, folks, fellow apes

Reduce to one word: “Folks.”

Ladies, Gentleman, and avid pronoun collectors.