I was really glad that my mom didn’t stop me from doing girly things when I was young. I was allowed to wear my sister’s dresses and play with dolls. Most of my friends when I was young were also girls, not sure exactly why that was, but it carried on that way most of my life to a lesser extent. It turns out I’m not trans, but I’m glad to have those formative experiences to inform my relation with my gender.

I’d say I’m more angry at having to be denying myself for reasons that even today I don’t really understand. Growing up with this song and dance in a family that wants to mold their next generation to their image only taught me that I, as a being, and my thoughts, are never to be trusted. And since everyone else wanted something different from me, they can’t be right too.

Thus, being trans (or living in conditions comparable to being trans) always meant to me to be ‘eternally wrong’. I think its not that uncommon of an experience in general, but growing up in a hostile environment as a literal child till adulthood, there are many, many things that I had to learn about me.

I never truly knew what I would want to try out, never developed social interest for a long time, just starting after I got my HRT going. It felt as I was being held back surviving, thus never really developing.

It is exactly that living, exploring and taking interest at the appropriate developmental stage which i mourn. I may have grown a lot over the years, but that feeling of not quite being part of society due to that different trajectory hasn’t really gone away.

tl,dr; I think its quite comparable to cptsd, due to the alienation to ourselves in developmental stages many of us have to use to survive socially, and I definitely feel what you say. Kind of like a promise of a childhood never held.

I’m in a bit of a weirder spot, being agender. It’s more that I resent things that were decided for me and done to me than on things I missed out on. The few exceptions are things that are basic human skills, especially cooking, that were never taught to me because my parents think of it as a gendered activity.

I used to feel really bad about missing out on my early years of life, it made me feel weak, but you know what? I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s okay to be weak, it’s okay to feel pain, it means you’re alive and you’re aware of your feelings, they can be used in clever ways for a chance of a better tomorrow. We can create memories now, for the future and watch something enjoyable that we might be able to look back on in the future.

Being weak is much better than being ignorant or trying to hide from problems instead of finding ways to address them. Unfortunately we don’t have a time machine, so best we can do is live now. Use sadness as a force for good.

I watched MLPFIM when I was a teenager and I really enjoyed it, I’m not trans though. I think that for a kid’s show it’s pretty cool, it plays with interesting mythology which isn’t based around LOTR which means a lot to be honest since basically everything is based around that. It’s not the best thing in the world but I’d recommend it, lol. Maybe I’m not the best person to talk about this but this feeling is just part of existing, I’ve also lost things I’ve coulda done as a kid because… I was poor. It’s just hard not to live in our ghosts, but also there’s isn’t much to be gained from it.

Yes! There’s so many things that cis women assume I’ve done that I just haven’t. I get really frustrated when something gets brought up that I missed out on. Which is why when I first came out, I watched gossip girl lol.

The one I feel like that effected me the most was playing on a boys soccer team instead of a girls. Looking back, i was SO jealous whenever I saw them together. I still get sad about it sometimes.

Idk, I like mlp

I watched My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic as a teenager. That show was pretty cool although I stopped watching it because I thought I got repetitive. The show is meant for kids and as a kid show it is league ahead of other kid shows. But as an adult now, I do not think I could have enjoyed that show as much as when I was a teenager and did not have access to adult shows with more complexity. Although I think out of any animated kids show from the 2010s, Gravity Falls will always be near to my heart and still holds up even as an adult. Sorry I did not see Adventure Time or Regular Show. And I barely watched Steven Universe.

I was a cisgender dude watching it. I have two Fluttershy plushies and a plastic collectible and one Pinkie Pie plushie because my parents did not know what to give me as a teenager, so they just started giving MLP stuff.

I missed out on quite a lot of things but that was mostly from being poor rather than trans.

For trans specifically I’m more upset I kept being forced to do things I didn’t want to but was expected to because I was a “boy”. Sports, for example. I didn’t mind playing sports I just didn’t like that I wasn’t given a choice in the matter.

Except baseball. I hated baseball. Too much waiting around. It was extremely boring.