I never wanted kids. I have nothing against them but it really seems like something you really need to want to do or have a good reason for doing it. “Milestone” just wasn’t doing it for me, and it didn’t help I never met anyone remotely interested in having kids with me.

I remember starting Genshin and given identical abilities, I preferred to look at a female character for the first few hours. I don’t project myself into games, I always feel like I’m playing the characters as themselves.

I learned on a typewriter in '91, we got docked if we didn’t double space.

Literallyly

Y’all make a cute couple but she’s doing the heavy lifting.

Their idiocy is weaponized with social media and omnipresent gambling. Social media wasn’t really real for me until I was well into my 20s and gambling was 4 hours away in Vegas. Even though I quit Facebook in 2011 and never got into twitter/insta/tiktok, I still posted on reddit for dopamine hits from strangers and bots.

“I was an idiot when I was young. I still am but I was an idiot back then too.” -Michael Scott

This is as smart as he’s ever felt about himself.

Your left hand makes an L when you extend your thumb and forefinger. I was also blessed with a mole on the back of my left wrist so it was ingrained pretty early on.

Apple put the nail in the coffin for adverbs when “Think different” let illiterates think they were speaking correctly.

A one-time tax of 5%. Any respectable billionaire is confident they can make that up in a year.

I voted blue and donated to contested races as much as I could afford. I am too lazy/socially anxious to canvass or do anything active like that. In my bubble, there was plenty of Kamala hype and even though I didn’t believe it, all I could do was ask anonymous online strangers to vote and hope enough of them voted my way. I shouldn’t have been surprised at the power of racism and sexism in the country but it was still a shock to the system. In my circles supporting him was utterly unthinkable so I have no explanation on how it happened.

I worked for a financial advisor who made most of his money through a textbook he wrote. It was on its 14th edition over 10 years ago. It’s a business calculus textbook. Calculus hasn’t changed in hundreds of years but the word problem examples needed to change from companies to dotcom companies to AI companies. He has dozens of co-authors at this point, he hasn’t added anything beyond his stamp of approval in many years. He made almost as much as a passive author as he did as a financial advisor.

Me and my buddy were sitting on the couch smoking bowls watching news coverage about all the crowds at the theaters. We were a couple of blocks away from one so we decided to drive by and see how crazy it was in-person. Once at the theater, there was plenty of parking and no lines. We went to the box office expecting there were no lines because everything was sold out but we were able to buy two tickets to the next showing around 9p. We had enough time to go back and smoke more bowls and when we got back to the theater, we had plenty of choices for seats. I remember how much I hated the acting performance out of young Anakin and Natalie Portman, and whatever it was that Jar Jar was supposed to be. When The Force was explained as a blood disease I questioned why I ever liked Star Wars at all. I enjoyed Episode III when the jedi kids were slaughtered, The Force Awakens, and the last bit of Rogue One, but haven’t kept up with any of the side stories or origin stories. The first time I questioned my fandom was when I went to the theaters for the specialized editions. When I saw the CGI I thought if this is what his vision was supposed to be maybe I don’t like his vision.

It’s a learning tool like an answer key is a learning tool. I’m pretty sure my college textbooks included correct answers for odd numbered problems but never complete solutions.

Cigarettes are so awesome I craved them while on ecstasy. If you didn’t BYO you would be stuck bumming a menthol. Cigarettes are so awesome that I would smoke a menthol. They are so awesome I am scared to smoke another one.

Rolling over a payday loan. You write them a check for $300 post dated for payday, they hand you $255. On payday, I would go back with a fresh $300 check to replace the one they just cashed so they could hand me another $255. This would be after exhausting overdraft from my checking that cost something like $35 to overdraw by $200. I wasn’t even on hard drugs or drinking, just weed and nicotine. By the time I was 30 I had $15k in financial judgements against me, it took another 4 years to pay everything off. It almost cost me a promotion during the credit check. Apparently you shouldn’t be a financial advisor if you’re terrible with your own finances but I talked my way out of it (and then failed as a financial advisor).

It’s called catfishing and they were VICTIMS!