This is genius

  • MIDItheKID@lemmy.worldEnglish
    0·
    24 days ago

    Last year for Halloween I asked my daughter what she wanted to be. She said she wanted to be the Big Bad Wolf. I asked her who I should be and she said Goldilocks.

    Yes I am aware that they are not even from the same story.

    But when your daughter says so, then you do so.

    Except for maybe blackface. Don’t ever do blackface.

    • Grail@multiverse.soulism.netEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Here in Australia there was a scandal a few years ago when a kid went to the book fair dressed as his favourite author, which is a very normal thing to do, except that his favourite author was Nic Naitinui and he went in blackface with a dreadlock wig, which is very not normal. A lot of people got angry. A lot of other people said “Well he’s just a kid, he didn’t know” and tried to invalidate the anger. One of the people saying that was the kid’s mum. Problem is, the day before the book fair she was on facebook talking about her plan and saying she didn’t care who she offended. Kid mightn’t’ve known, but mum sure did.

    • cmbabul@slrpnk.netEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Unless you are Robert Downey Jr and cast in a role specifically satirizing the concept of privilege, how the entertainment industry appropriates black culture and identity for profit, and how often extremely racist roles are considered Oscar bait for prestige actors(even if said role is appropriately portrayed as a villain). And you also had to be talked into doing it by black friends and colleagues

      That is the only time it is ever ok and it already happened so no more blackface

  • topperharlie@lemmy.worldEnglish
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    24 days ago

    I’m a CIS heterosexual guy that almost every time I have wear a costume it’s been of female nature.

    I wouldn’t mind someone coming to me like you mentioned and wouldn’t get angry, with the exception of someone being drunk and trying a bit too hard to convince me I’m really an egg. Which wouldn’t make me angry either, as I’m not confrontational, but I would really think they suck.

    If you can take a “I understand the confusion but I just prefer Tinkerbell to peter pan” as an answer without needing more explanations we are good, but don’t get too intense, making all non gender conforming decisions something deep and political just emphasizes gender conformity.

    Let us just have fun and don’t always assume that if someone is not an egg it has to be a dudebro. I don’t feel insulted for being called an egg, but I do feel insulted for being called a dudebro.

  • terranoid@lemmy.cafeEnglish
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    24 days ago

    Or you embarrass the shit out of someone exploring gender identity and they feel like even wearing a dress on Halloween means everyone thinks they’re a trans woman, and they need to go back and fit in the gender box they were assigned

    Not everyone needs to transition

    • Donkter@lemmy.worldEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Yeah the implication that someone dressing as the other gender is a reason to attempt to punish them just doesn’t make sense on so many levels here.

    • GalacticSushi@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Even if they are an egg who should likely transition some day, they kinda need to come to that conclusion themselves. Trying to force that info on them before they’re ready to accept it could very likely push that back into repressing their gender even longer. Probably better to tell them they look great in that outfit and they’re really pulling it off. Give them the euphoria of feeling cute and hope they figure the rest out.

    • Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zonedeleted by creatorOPEnglish
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      24 days ago

      I agree that not everyone needs to transition.

      However, I don’t see the problem in at least trying to be helpful. Gently trying to open up this topic, seeing how they react. If they’re uncomfortable or not interested, you don’t push them ofc and you leave them alone. If they become angry, it’s probably a shitty cis guy.

      I personally would have given anything for someone to have done this for me 5-6 years ago. I would give anything to have started earlier. And pardon me for being blunt, but if you don’t experience the crippling pain that is gender dysphoria, you may not completely understand that yourself.

      • Jiggle_Physics@quokk.auEnglish
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        24 days ago

        If you plan to actually try to help someone who does this on halloween, please do it at a different time, in private, and be very careful about what you say, and how you approach this. There is a reason we have the saying that the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

    • StoneStar@feddit.nlEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Been misgendered as “egg” too many times. No, I’m nb, but thanks for implying I’m something I’m not.

    • KombatWombat@lemmy.worldEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Yeah, I imagine this would be awkward much more often than it would be well-received. Most people aren’t trans, and assuming their costume is secretly a cry for help is likely to embarrass them. It’s the one time of the year you are supposed to be able to dress weird without people making assumptions about you.

  • HerbGrower@slrpnk.netEnglish
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    24 days ago

    But there are other options too… Some may just like an excuse to cross dress in public without transitioning

    • Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zonedeleted by creatorOPEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Sure. But you can probably figure that out by gauging their reaction. If they seem to get angry, it’s almost certainly a shitty cis dude.

      • protist@retrofed.comEnglish
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        24 days ago

        Intentionally trying to provoke people whose identities and intentions you don’t even know is kinda shitty though, isn’t it?

        • Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zonedeleted by creatorOPEnglish
          0·
          24 days ago

          Would you call this provocation tho? From my understanding, this meme was mostly bashing cis dudes who basically make fun of trans people by “dressing up as women” and using that in offensive and misogynistic ways.

          But yes you’re right, it is. And I admit I’m a really shitty person.

          • protist@retrofed.comEnglish
            0·
            24 days ago

            I guess my problem is reducing the pool of people down to eggs and misogynistic dude bros, when in reality there’s a wide array of personalities and identities

              • protist@retrofed.comEnglish
                0·
                24 days ago

                We all live and learn. I was a total asshole at your age, I think you’re doing great 😂 Thank you for listening.

                • Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zonedeleted by creatorOPEnglish
                  0·
                  24 days ago

                  “Your age”? How dare you? 😭 /s

                  No but seriously, I transitioned from total asshole to total bitch, so this isn’t your fault at all, lol. I actually really am sorry.
                  Thank you 💜

  • Duchess@piefed.linenoise.vipEnglish
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    24 days ago

    Oh the number of Halloweens my egg ass wore a dress 🤭 I was pretty performative with my gender too so nobody suspected a thing it was a big old laugh. I wish I had had queer friends to even know that transitioning was a thing!

  • expatriado@lemmy.worldEnglish
    0·
    24 days ago

    cis dude already dressed as a girl as a joke, so probably would take trans material and an extension of the joke

    • oatscoop@midwest.socialEnglish
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      24 days ago

      Option C: Someone suffering gender dysphoria that’s deeply in denial and will lash out worse than the “shitty cis guy” as a defense mechanism.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.worldEnglish
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        23 days ago

        Yeah, much better to just say “oh that looks good on you” or something to that vein. Be someone who they feel safe dressing that way around. You can then offer tips if they’re interested. But ultimately the best course of action is to accept that for an egg this is something terrifying and brave they’re doing already, it does no good to try to crack the shell harder. And for a cis guy by treating it as something that’s not outrageous you can make it more fun for those who like the experimentation and subversion of roles and less fun for the ones who are doing it for shock value and similar reasons.

    • SectoidLexi@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
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      23 days ago

      It’s not mean to offer transition advice. If a guy is not looking for that he can politely decline. Unless you think being transfem is a bad thing and thus think the suggestion of being one is a bad thing?

    • Grail@multiverse.soulism.netEnglish
      0·
      24 days ago

      The Egg Prime Directive is highly controversial. Personally, I think it’s callous and destructive, and has probably cost lives. I’m trans, and I welcome younger relatives to talk about gender with Me. I always make sure to tell them that they get to choose their gender, whatever they want it to be. We’ve already had a trans suicide in the family.

      • SuperNovaStar@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
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        24 days ago

        I think if it’s interpreted as “don’t tell other people their gender for them” I think it’s good.

        Expressing acceptance for people regardless of their gender presentation is good, and making sure that people know transitioning is an option is good. Insisting someone has to be trans when they tell you they aren’t is bad. Insisting that gender nonconformity is something only trans people can or would do is bad.

        Basically, respect and support people no matter their gender or gender expression, and take people at their word when they say “this is who I am.”

        • Grail@multiverse.soulism.netEnglish
          0·
          24 days ago

          Yeah, I make sure to respect people’s self-identification. Mostly I talk about how HRT is magic and (if talking to an adult) how I got a huge ass from it