• merari42@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
        15·
        1 年前

        Our group of teenagers should definitely split up to search for the monster and/or serial killer!

        • The Quuuuuill@slrpnk.netEnglish
          15·
          1 年前

          Rather than making a swift exit to anywhere else, we should instead hide in this building where we think the killer is

          • activ8r@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
            11·
            1 年前

            Oh my god! It’s the killers childhood home where he brutally killed one of his family members in each room! Let’s hide in there, but we should each find a hiding spot in a different room.

      • BinaryEnthusiast@lemmy.worldEnglish
        9·
        1 年前

        That’s why I love Cabin in the woods. They make it a creepy movie, but also make fun of all the common horror tropes by having the haunted grounds be a very orchestrated event.

        “Oh no my cell phone doesn’t work” It’s because the creepy org turned on a cell phone jammer

        “Why don’t they just leave?” The creepy org blows up a shit load of tnt to make the tunnel collapse

      • CarbonIceDragon@pawb.socialEnglish
        1·
        1 年前

        It would be kinda funny for someone to make something that starts as a horror movie but then everyone acts in a sensible manner without contrived reasons for their efforts failing, resulting in the whole dangerous situation falling apart over the course of the plot until its more a sort of parody of horror movies than a proper example.

    • ChonkyOwlbear@lemmy.worldEnglish
      14·
      1 年前

      There are also a swath of movies that couldn’t be made because of the ubiquity of surveillance cameras.

      Who did it!?! ~Checks camera~

    • MeatsOfRage@lemmy.worldEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      Not just cellphones but every house now is equipped with a camera on the doorbell and possibly several more throughout the house. Back in the day serial killers basically just had to not be around when the police showed up and had a pretty good chance of just getting away

  • Mokopa@lemmy.worldEnglish
    351·
    1 年前

    You wouldn’t make “Back To The Future” now because it wouldn’t be the future…

  • alcoholicorn@lemmy.mlEnglish
    33·
    1 年前

    You couldn’t make Blazing Saddles these days. They’d take one look at the script and go

    spoiler

    “We can’t make this, this is Blazing Saddles, they made it 40 years ago. Do you want Mel Brooks to sue us?”

    • Queen HawlSera@lemm.eeEnglish
      0·
      1 年前

      Funny story Mel Brooks actually did an animated version of Blazing Saddles called The Legend of Hank to prove that he absolutely could make it today.

      It’s basically the same concept but with samurai instead of cowboys.

      “Ain’t no business like shogun business.”

  • JackGreenEarth@lemm.eeEnglish
    342·
    1 年前

    You couldn’t make Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone now because you’re not Warner Brothers and don’t own the copyright.

  • marine_mustang@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    19·
    1 年前

    You couldn’t make Jaws today because the ubiquity of cheap drones means the shark would be tracked continuously until it left Amity Island.

    • Drusas@fedia.io
      1·
      1 年前

      I have to disagree. The shark spends the vast majority of its time underwater, not within viewing distance. And they didn’t tag it with any tracker.

      Could they tag it with a tracker these days? Absolutely. But none of the individuals on board the Orca would likely have been funded for that, even including Hooper. He was a rich boy, but how rich could he have been if he’s hiring Quint instead of a proper crew on a research vessel?

  • fireweed@lemmy.worldEnglish
    141·
    1 年前

    I mean, you could totally make Home Alone II today as long as you set it pre-9/11, so I take this to mean “these movies that were set in the ‘present day’ could not be redone and set in the ‘present day’ of 2024.”

    You couldn’t make Back to the Future because 21st century streets are no place for minors on skateboards.

    You couldn’t make American Beauty for a LOT of reasons (including prevalence of digital video, marijuana legalization, increased public awareness/concern about pedophilia, etc)

    You couldn’t make Clueless because shopping malls are dead (or at least nowhere near as cool as they used to be)

    You couldn’t make Trainspotting or Requiem for a Dream because heroin and cocaine are quaint drugs by 2020s standards

    You couldn’t make Paris is Burning because Harlem gentrified big time (I know this is a documentary but still)

    You couldn’t make The Matrix because no one would believe human batteries would be happy and content living in a simulation of 2024 (also no telephone booths)

    I almost said The Truman Show because we basically live in that world already but fuck it, I wanna see a 2024 version where the producers have to keep desperately introducing crazier plot developments to try and compete for a TikTok-addicted audience unamused by “just another reality TV show”, and constant set issues like cast members getting fired right and left for sneaking smartphones onto set.

    • ℍ𝕂-𝟞𝟝@sopuli.xyzEnglish
      8·
      1 年前

      I mean, you could totally make Home Alone II today as long as you set it pre-9/11

      Yeah, it’s like saying “you couldn’t make Saving Private Ryan, because Europe is no longer at war”.

      • KmlSlmk64@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        1 年前

        I think you’re absolutely correct, but I think the difference between “Home alone today” vs “Save private Ryan today” is, that when thinking about home alone, because the story is essentially time/context agnostic, they might imagine in being today, but in the save private Ryan it is specifically refering to 2nd world war, so noone would think about it being placed in today’s world But yeah, I agree with you. I could totally imagine a big movie creator lobbying government(s) to hamper war-ending efforts, so they can film there authentically, if it was easier than to do it in a studio

    • grue@lemmy.worldEnglish
      2·
      1 年前

      You couldn’t make Back to the Future because 21st century streets are no place for minors on skateboards.

      Delete this misinformation.

  • eponymous_anonymous@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    11·
    1 年前

    They couldn’t make Mrs Doubtfire in this day & age - no one would believe Pierce Brosnan and Sally Field make enough money to afford a live-in nanny.

    Also, they couldn’t make Mrs. Doubtfire 2. Full stop. There will never be a sequel to that magnificent gem.

  • WolfLink@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    10·
    1 年前

    I wanna see a modern Zombie movie with how people would actually react to news of a zombie outbreak given how people behaved during the pandemic

    • Rozz@lemmy.sdf.orgEnglish
      4·
      1 年前

      Zombies ain’t rea…OH GOD ITS EATING MY FACE…still don’t believe it, he’s just on drugs.

    • Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.worldEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      • Half the population claims it’s all a hoax and lets zombies bite them because anything else is a violation of their freedoms

      • Large swaths of gun owners take to the streets, and half of them die quickly because they put more money into the number of guns they had or making them tacticool instead of putting rounds through them or sighting them in.

      • It gets overly politicized.

      • The literal collapse of civilization, yet some corners of the government and billionaires are still trying to milk out the last drop of money

      • Breadhax0r@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        1 年前

        Don’t look up was basically this but a meteor instead of zombies. It was honestly kind of a depressing movie lol

      • tetris11@lemmy.mlEnglish
        0·
        1 年前

        I actually think it would be good uniting force for a divided country:

        • The “it’s a hoax” portion of the population will simply become zombies
        • The “we love guns” portion of the population can now take their life frustrations out on the zombies
        • The “we need to fix this world” portion of the population will learn to fight too and provide vital aid and supplies to the (likely growing) “we love guns” group
        • The “we need run away from this madness” portion of the population will just hunker down and play on their smartphones

        Either way, everyone kind of wins

        • Apepollo11@lemmy.worldEnglish
          1·
          1 年前

          I think you’re a little off on the “we need to fix this world” guys.

          Although zombie films / TV series lean heavily into the action side of things, that’s just because it’s more entertaining than watching people building things, developing tech, doing scientific research.

          Remember with COVID 19? Huge numbers of people immediately set out to find a cure, inventing and deploying ways to prevent and monitor the spread, creating pop-in treatment centres, etc.

    • monotremata@lemmy.caEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      “No, I am not going with you to a concert in the park! There’s a zombie horde out there! We’ll get bitten!”

      “Hey, even the WHO says it’s not an apocalypse anymore. The zombies are endemic now. You can’t live your life in fear.”

      “Your mom was eaten by zombies literally last week.”

      “Yeah but she had diabetes. There’s always gonna be people with preexisting conditions who are gonna be more vulnerable.”

      “At least wear your denim jacket to make it harder for them to bite you!”

      “There was a study in the Lancet that said heavy clothes don’t work.”

      “You know full well that what they found was that requiring heavy clothes didn’t work because people just got bitten at the times when they weren’t wearing them.”

      “The author himself said jackets don’t work.”

      “He said that after he was bitten and just before demanding our brains!”

      “Okay, sheeple. Oh, hey Mom. We’re just heading out to the concert.”

      “Wait, your mom is here? I thought she was…”

      “BRAAAAIINSSS…”

      “You LET HER BACK IN after she died and came back as a zombie!?”

      “Dude, she’s not infectious anymore. She caught it like four days ago.”

      “That is NOT how this works! What… DON’T HUG HER!”

      “Bye Mom, love you…ow!”

      “She just bit you, didn’t she.”

      “Nah, I’m fine. Let’s go to the concert.”

    • ChonkyOwlbear@lemmy.worldEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      The movie follows a minimum wage delivery driver in his armored car plowing through hordes of zombies to deliver pizza to the safe houses where people are hiding out.

      Edit: When he delivers the pizza, the survivors complain it is cold and don’t tip. He backs his truck through their security fence, letting the zombies in and drives off to the next delivery.

    • Ricky Rigatoni@lemm.eeEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      28 Days Later had a dinnertable conversation that was exsctly like how people were talking during covid.

      • Final Remix@lemmy.worldEnglish
        1·
        1 年前

        Isn’t that the “… but then it wasn’t in news reports anymore; it was in our back yards, and coming in the windows…” monologue? Excellent scene.

    • booly@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      Avenue 5 has a pretty funny scene where a series of skeptical conspiracy theorist types are ignoring a very specific warning, claiming that the people they see dying before their very eyes are an illusion some kind of special effects and each follows to their own death.

    • OpenStars@discuss.onlineEnglish
      1·
      1 年前

      I mean, technically you could still make it though… it likely wouldn’t sell any copies, but then again look at Skibidi, or better yet, don’t:-D.

  • xantoxis@lemmy.worldEnglish
    2·
    1 年前

    You couldn’t make Deadpool & Wolverine today because it just came out and people would not be ready for a reboot this early.

  • i_give_u_worms@lemmy.worldEnglish
    1·
    1 年前

    Scully and Mulder often had to clarify “they were in an area that did not get great cellphone coverage” thirty years ago, they were always getting separated in urban settings